When a topic of discussion causes you to react heatedly to another, it makes the other person respond harshly as well. This turns a discussion into an argument, and the emotions on both sides tend to escalate. The conversation transforms from a civil and intelligent dialogue into a discourteous and emotional verbal battle. No matter who gets in the last word, there is no real winner in this situation.
You can prevent such an outcome by taking control of your inner self. When you hear an opinion which sharply differs from your own, take the time to pause, reflect, and not answer back immediately. By doing this, you prevent a lot of distress. The offensive and defensive nature of another dies down when only that person is engaged in a battle. When you practice such self discipline, you avoid sinking in to a spiritual abyss and instead raise yourself to a higher spiritual plane. Then you become the winner.
Would that more people practice this, myself included.
However, anger is a human emotion, and one that should not be completely suppressed or worse things can happen. It’s what happens after the argument that matters perhaps as much or more than the argument itself. Do the parties find common resolution? Are apologies made and accepted? Does the anger stay with one or both people until the relationship is severed? It’s OK to get angry sometimes but not to the destruction of a soul, a friendship, or a relationship.
We are on the same page with your rhetorical questions, Grantman. Yes, anger is a human emotion – but it is a negative human emotion. Losing control of ones anger is losing control of oneself. Looking through both personal and world history, I’m not sure I can come up with anything that could be worse than those actions taken by someone or some group out of control by their anger and rage. Friendships, relationships and peoples have all faced destruction because of that. When we give in to anger, we go down a path of destruction to our soul. Self discipline will keep our soul intact.